Spiritual Attack.

I started School of Ministry this week! I still find it hard to grasp that I did this... Stopped going to school at OSU to go to "church school" (as my dad calls it........bleh :P)  Anyway, It's amazing. Actually, "amazing" doesn't even come close to describing how "amazing" it truly is.  I love it. Today is my first day off and I am already missing school. I wanted to go today so bad!!!

The first few days were pretty tough though, not gonna lie.  I was completely caught off guard.  I knew it was the enemy shooting at me with his fiery darts.

A couple years ago I suffered from horrible demonic dreams at night.  They didn't even seem like dreams either because they seemed so real.  I would be laying in my bed and then just be completely covered by and attacked by demons holding me down so that I couldn't move at all.  I would be screaming out for "Jesus! Jesus! Jesus!" over and over again and....honestly I can't remember anymore but it was traumatizing.  That dream (which happened several times) is always the first thing that comes to my mind when I think the words "spiritual attack."  This week though, the spiritual attack I encountered was much less traumatic but arguably just as horrible because it actually could have changed the course of my life if I had given into the devil's schemes.

LIES flooded my mind this week. I can't remember the last time I was fed this many lies in such a short period of time.  When the thoughts of these lies are constant, it is difficult(to say the least) not to give into them or even ponder on them.

Some of them were,

"I can't do this." This was a recurring one...wonder why!

"I'm not going to make any friends"

"I have no money. How am I going to pay for this? How am I going to live?" "My job is horrible"

There were a lot more but I have forgotten them now. Anyway, Satan used my innermost fears and just whispered them to me nonstop for the first two weeks of school.

I was also not prepared at all for this spiritual attack.  I think it was a tactic of the enemy to keep me from being in the word and in close fellowship with God as the summer came to a close because in my mind I watered down what SOM would be like and thought, I am going to be in the word all of the time soon. Therefore, it's okay if I'm not reading God's word now.  LIE!  So, that obviously led to a lack of faith, and when our shield of faith is down that is when the enemy has a perfect, open target.

Thankfully, everyday at school those lies were broken with the truth spoken to me through teachers and classmates.  I knew it was attack while it was happening so I made the choice not to act on any of the lies that spun through my mind.  I just wanted them to STOP!!

Well, they eventually did.  At least now they are not coming at the same pace and number as before.  Thank you, Lord!  But I know the enemy hasn't given up.  So, until the next attack I will be in the word.  I will prepare. I will seek the Lord. I will cling to Him.  I will raise my shield of faith.